An aerial view of the Columbia Ranch in it’s heyday.
January 3, 1981-we begin our rooftop story:
The Boys and I love a good challenge, my gang tonight are all good friends who have grown up together on movie backlots- alongside me. You may recognize their names-Jimmy, Pat and Danny from previous adventures. Tonight, we’re going to do something special –trespass the Columbia Ranch at night. We have done Warner Brothers and Universal in the dark and of course the MGM lots and Desilu, but we’ve yet to tackle this 40-acre ranch.
We arrive by way of Jimmy’s square back VW and park in an empty parking lot behind a barb wire cage that protects Hollywood from onlookers. We sit momentarily staring at a sharply covered brick wall, Blondie sings “Call Me” on the radio and we get out the car and stand on our horseshoes. “They’ve added more barb wire since last visit” I point out. The four of us are sizing up the situation. Looking for the path of least resistance. We see a section of brick wall not wrapped in wire.
This is where the rubber meets the rode and in 30 seconds, we are all now taking cover in nearby bushes inside the backlot. We use a climbing method so simple it childish. One kid puts his hands together forming a cup, the next kid puts his foot in that cup and is lifted high enough to pull himself up to the top. Once there-that kid on top pulls the kid who boosted him upwards by his extended arms. It’s almost like cheating it’s so easy and quick. All you need is the right fence situation, meaning no sharp barbs or edges.
We lurk slowly towards Fantasy Island, which is as dark as you can get. We let our eyes turn into night vision goggles, on the look for the slightest movements. Employees move around in the daylight, but spirits travel at night. We fit right in.
Clocks are unnecessary since we have no where we need to go-we’re in exploration mode. We’ve all been here before and know certain sections better than others. It takes time to learn every square inch of a backlot-it took a couple years of “all the time visitations” to master the MGM backlot 2. The area we that attracts us is the rooftops on the tall New York Skylines. Weaving in between parked Police cars, ambulances, Army trucks, all boxed in tight formation like a Hot Wheels carrying case.
As tempting as it is to sit inside some of these unlocked picture cars from various shows, it’s just not safe yet, that still needs to be determined. Roof tops will determine exactly what and where is safe. Soldier on…we continue behind buildings and through every kind of doorway possible, we arrive at the staircase that takes you 4 stories high where we can get a handle on what we may be in for tonight.
Much of this interior ascension upwards is in Braille- meaning you can’t see. Slowly proceed up each step, making sure- there is a step. Just because- it’s a long fall the higher you go. The rooftop is our sanctuary. It overlooks the entire backlot, this set is in the middle of the backlot with very long distances in each direction to reach safety if being chased. Anything’s possible, but no time to worry, rather time to celebrate…No risk-No reward moment!
We quickly light a joint and take in all our surroundings. A cold breeze blows off tiny sparks like fireflies towards our faces. You know- Danny’s high- when he goes into a music trance and everything becomes part of a Slingerland drum set. Everything…His lap, the wood he’s sitting on, and the guy he’s sitting next to are all make shift drum set pieces. Just the other night we enjoyed Buddy Rich on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Danny went completely nuts over this band leader, drummer extraordinaire as did Doc Severinsen. Buddy is the real deal. Rodney Dangerfield added humor as only he can deliver.
Just 3 months ago, exactly where are car is parked tonight, the F.M radio dial, 95.5 KLOS informed us John Bonham, Led Zeppelin’s drummer, passed away. That afternoon we all trespassed this same wall… with very heavy hearts. I digress…
Still up on the roof– Jimmy and I pass this Bomber doobie while game planning what to expect in tomorrows championship football game between the Raiders and the Browns, while Pat sits fixated on the picture cars below. He’s a trespassing Transportation Captain, specializing in cars that aren’t his. Pat and Danny have beards, and Pat has on a Fedora he picked up at MGM awhile back. Up on this roof we must look like an Allman Brothers record cover. The only thing missing are the instrument cases.
We can relax up here because we have the upper hand. No one knows we’re here, and we can see everywhere. There is always anxiety when – traversing in the backlot- since these studios are 24/7. Never take anything completely for granted but it appears tonight it’s just us. Very few lights are on and none where we choose to go.
We retrace the stairway back down and cross a paved street, passing a large circular fountain and square pool. We are a slingshot away now from the Dennis the Menace house now, which I enter for the first time at night. “I too- my little blonde friend- am extremely accurate with rubber band attached to a stick” I say as I open the front door. Just in case he’s hiding in here…
It’s always fun when a group of kids get in character when entering a set with a glorious past-we become that family that was …canceled!
In the dark, at ground level, the large buildings we were just on top of look so imposing. We have a tendency to compare sets we are on to other sets at other studios and that’s because…we’ve seen and touched them all. Both daytime and night time. The night winds down without any unwanted visitors or interventions as we quietly touch back down on the asphalt parking lot where this night began…
40 years later here we are again…
A couple of months back, Maureen and I came to the guard shack with high hopes of sharing a little past history and perhaps getting a snapshot or two. We were appropriately dressed. She said I looked like I just stepped out of “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” and she was wearing her “C’mon Get Happy” Partridge Family t-shirt. We came to pay a final visit to Columbia Ranch and show our respects and we ended up being the center a “Code 3.” The Burbank Police showed up after an irate guard threw a frenzy as we took pictures at the entrance.
Whatever happened to the Ken Hollywood’s of the world, security guards who double as legends themselves. The icons of MGM security, who wore bright smiles above shiny silver badges. Friends to movie stars and trespassers alike. Guards such as him who would introduce this impressionable teen ager to MGM’s legendary talent. Complete with decades of stories of how wonderful the magic of Hollywood touched all of us.
Written and lived by Maureen Miller and Donnie Norden.
The Partridge Family home
Bewitched Home I took 30 years apart
Dennis the Menace pulling “Opie” on a wagon in front of the home. And the same Home I took while trespassing
I Dream of Jennie home and renovation below it
Under the Rainbow 1981 and my trespassing picture below it
The Partridge Family on Western Street
The Partridge Family on Western Street
The Fantasy Island cottage at Columbia Ranch undressed
And a B&W pic I took of the cottage “dressed“
Another B&W set from Fantasy Island on the backlot
Andy Griffith in Savage-1 with my photo on the left
The Walton’s home at Columbia Ranch
Filming Hooper on the backlot and my picture below it
40 years apart, Gate 11 in better days…
Behind me is one upset guard with his camera out and calling police.
We don’t cause trouble-it follows us.
Maureen… I hear trouble behind me…
The police have arrived with sirens no less, we didn’t think it was for us until, they positioned themselves on the street corners. One police car went inside the lot. I quickly concluded it’s time for Bonnie and Clyde to make for the getaway car. We hid behind the white truck before driving past this developing situation. We decided to cover our tracks, literally in a Pullman car at nearby Travel Town to process what just happened. It wouldn’t be the first time a Pullman car would provide a hideout for us. Calmly like the 63 year olds we are, we left the area with one final memory. Maureen and I love backlots – We plead guilty to that charge!
One final Goodbye
I love this studio because it was nestled in with real life normal people living everyday life with a balcony view of the studio. Maureen’s apartment growing up was just outside MGM’s fences. Sequence of pics from off lot, behind house and front door. Picture one of Bewitched house from Oak St. The address used for this fictitious house is 1164 Morning Glory Circle.
“Come and get me Mr. Security Guard- Be careful not to fall in the trench”
Backside New York Street.
I can be found on backlot rooftops…
Looking towards Forest Lawn Drive from the highest vantage point on the Columbia Ranch
Gate 11-Hollywood Way-located behind trees.
The backside view from same roof-a silver spaceship, off in the distance, left side of building. Subtle changes-years apart
The rooftops we are on in my Trespassing Story…
View of Western Town from the highest vantage point I can climb on.
Those rooftops overlook the backlot, a fountain is situated on the front side-in a park setting.This place is like a kid’s toy chest. I’ll take you up there in today’s story, a night time trespassing adventure…This area can double for car salesman Cal Worthington. We can sell you a car,. any car. Common Down, your credits good here!
Some of my Western Street pictures are beginning to fade away
The swimming pool on the lot which can be seen in many movie and television shows
This utility road sits directly behind The Bewitched home on the left, and the studio barbed wire ivy covered fence on the right– Oak Street.
A picture that breaks my heart; Then and now
Thanks for reading! For more backlot adventures, check out my newly released book on Amazon. Phantom of the Backlots Presents: Uninvited Visitor https://a.co/d/eRTFLsy
Phantom of the Backlots 
Great post. But that guard is a total snowflake. There is no expectation of privacy in public and you were totally within your rights to take photos from the streets. If the cops backed him up, you would have had a lawsuit.
Cops saw us but we didn’t look like trouble- they stared at us, we didn’t realize they were on call about us-we looked innocent and were. We were not trespassing. Thanks for following me on WordPress, FB is becoming difficult content wise.