Author: Phantom of the Backlot

The Twilight Zone—
Whenever I’m home “sick,” I watch reruns of the Twilight Zone, which air at Noon on channel 11. Dad is at work, so it’s just me and Mom. Thank goodness she doesn’t watch soap operas. I have the TV to myself! I sprawl out on the golden shag carpet with two cans of Snack Pack Chocolate Pudding and get ready to travel beyond space-time, and into a different world.

After five minutes of commercials, I hear those ominous four notes, which open the entryway into a mysterious new dimension… a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man… a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.

Above: NOT those ominous four notes that we all hear in our heads when we think of the Twilight Zone! This is the original theme song by Bernard Herrmann, which was done away with after only one season, in preference of Marius Constant’s “stock library notes” (not to mention the “stock library royalty free cost”), which were spliced together to create the iconic theme riff we all know.

Above: The theme we all know…

Glory Days—

Each episode is like a postcard from MGM’S celebrated past. TV didn’t even exist in MGM’s glory days. But now, in shows like The Twilight Zone, it’s all there… various and sundry, lavish furnishings; a crystal chandelier hanging over a long dining table; random items in a police station, a lamp on a desk; a typewriter in a Dr’s office; a chair in someone’s bedroom; an arched doorway… Because… the backlot is the real star! And although those opulent musicals have been laid down to rest, television is the new frontier and if you have a good eye, you can spot remnants of those old glory days.

MGM’s first ever TV show was the MGM Parade, which started after a fall out with 20th Century Fox over the Ed Sullivan show and went on to serve as a promotional vehicle for MGM’s movies.

When legal snags developed, MGM bought 25% of KTTV. That’s when TV production truly began. This was circa 1957. TV was still in its infancy. You were lucky to have one in your own home. If you did, I’m sure you have memories of being on top of your house, pointing your antenna in the best direction for optimal signal.

I remember my dad sending me up to the roof, while he yelled out commands, pointing with wild arms from the window below: A bit more THAT way… And it was like magic when the images finally showed up clearly on the screen.

Dr. Kildare and Andy Hardy Mysteries were the first series to get off the ground, but soon after, MGM had another dozen Made for TV productions coming down the pike.

On October 2nd, 1959… The Twilight Zone aired its first episode, shot at Universal, starring Earl Holliman. It was the only episode ever shot on the Universal Backlot.

The Combat TV series competed for backlot space and both series forever changed this lot. Or, in the case of Combat, blew it up!

The Twilight Zone made the backlot spooky… along with the Outer Limits, who were trying to take control of my TV set!

Above: No one takes control of my TV!

A Merry Gang—

Both of these series are my favorites, so whenever we watch episodes, we recreate everything we just saw, exactly where it happened. Today features “The Shelter,” so, dutifully, me and Pat and Jimmy will go re-enact that episode.

We climb in at our closest portal, the train station, and in no time we are on Maple Street, named after another Twilight Zone episode. Our focus today is The House with a Shelter…

We are a band of merry young men as we go marching and laughing down the utility road that parallels the railroad tracks on the other side of the studio fence.

Jimmy begins mimicking the line from this episode… why are your kids more important? Pat and I bust up, as Jimmy repeats it over and over in different tones as we walk down the brick pathway. We walk under a sycamore tree and then make our way up to the same front porch that the neighborhood mob forced its way through, on the facade of this cape cod style home.

Open the handle and what do you see…

Paper thin sheets of balsa wood serving as a wall and a lone patch of carpet laying on the floor gives the illusion of a comfortable home. Just throw up a family portrait, put a drink in your hand and some music on the stereo, and answer the door with a smile.

It’s the basic entryway to every house on this street. Dusty old drapes sit on either side of every front door. But grip jacks lean against the wall. Once you’re on the other side of this deceptive wall, you’ve made your exit. We take the outside stairway up to the second floor while reading lines from this episode… You foreigners are all alike!

We all take turns repeating it as we make our way to the top of the stairs and to the balcony.

The sycamore provides a lovely shade. We are safely hidden and being close to the fence, it’s an easy exit. You see, part of our mission is to take a quick survey of possible escape tactics since… we are smoking dope! We continue reciting lines as we laugh out smoke, knowing that a simple escape route has presented itself, if necessary.

What Is Real?—

We gaze down toward the street that is similar to where I live. But, come to think of it… I mostly live here, at MGM. I just go to my real home to eat and sleep. Ironically, the studio feels more real for me than what most people would consider real. While some people watch TV shows to be entertained and to escape from reality, my reality is living in this studio that you’re watching on your TV.

I like the reality inside the fenced-in studio world; it’s not “make believe” when you can see it, touch it, and smell it. Outside the studio fence is where the harsh realties of life take place, but not inside. The only reminder inside the studio that there’s evil in the world, is when the Red Bronco is on my tail.

This place is an escape, or a Shelter, if you will.

The church and its steeple look down on us as we exit The Shelter… now we walk through the front door of this studio parish. We see what the actors saw, as they swung open the front doors in the Twilight Zone episode… Stop Over in a Quiet Town. A ladder stretches to the top of the steeple, over 30 feet high. No platforms. Just a straight up climb, like a fireman would do.

We take our act over to the giant prop warehouse that is behind this church. Without having to say a word to each other, Jimmy and I trample over a maze of strange gadgets like a couple of tanks… our eyes lock onto the object of our desire: it seems to be a dusty old space capsule! It is cone shaped with a bunch of levers and knobs inside.

Meanwhile, Pat climbs on top a headless dinosaur and pretends to ride it. Jimmy and I take off… back into the fifth dimension… the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition… Just another fun day playing with extra big toys.

An ocean liner looks down on us as we walk up the gang plank… once inside, you realize it is just a wall. A ship it’s not; it has no backside and sits in a tiny, empty basin that can be filled with water to help make it appear as something it is not… we are in the business of illusions.

One big magic show, you gotta believe is all!

This is how I play almost everyday, then I go home and watch all this stuff on TV.

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…
Edited by DQ

Today I’m ditching school. This was decided last night. My mom will write me an excuse, since my grades are above average. My catholic school prepared me well. So, I get cocky and begin to treat this whole public school thing like a country club. I can auto-pilot this stuff. At Noon, my Dodgers play the Pirates in a playoff game, right here at home. This all-day school schedule is just too cumbersome.

Dodger Stadium is downtown and I don’t have a ride. Heck, I don’t even have tickets! And it’s not on T.V. But, I love Vin Scully, so, the radio will be my ditching pal today. My parents don’t know it yet, but my day will be spent at Desilu, just day-dreaming and relaxing in my own world. The Fortune is just finishing striking the village that took so long to build.

It’s early in the afternoon, on a sunny October day, as I slump into one of the two hammocks that are hanging from two giant trees. There is soft grass below and a gentle breeze cooling my skin. Life is good… I look on, as laborers load up the last remnants of a village that will never be seen again, except on film. I have seen this area get stripped clean before… when it was Stalag 13.  That’s life at a big studio!

My hammock gently sways like I’m on some magic carpet ride. I’m floating through the sky… and the overstuffed cotton ball clouds seem to drift right by me… and my mind also begins to drift… I remember a night, earlier this year, when me and the Sullivans spent the night here, in these very same hammocks, drinking Gallo wine. And after finishing off a whole gallon between us, we took an intoxicated walk around the entire lot at 3am… like Otis Cambell.

My reveries must’ve lulled me into a nap… I awake to this fond memory and quaint setting, all the while checking to see if I’m in a dream. When I go to sleep at night, I focus my mind on these studio backlots, attempting to steer my subconcious into specific dreams. Sometimes, guards chase me, awakening me… I often have one foot on the floor… ready to run… just as I wake up. The dream police are inside of my head!

My AM radio is tuned to KFI for Dodger Baseball and the pregame show is on… perfect timing. Every kid needs a day like this. I carry what’s left in my little lunch bag, a can of chocolate pudding and half a PB and J sandwich and a pocketful of Bazooka Joe bubble gum. I’m set. I begin my walk from this hilltop paradise to the creaky old sets in the town of Mayberry.

I pause for more Bazooka Joe… pretending I’m getting free gum. Gee Thanks, Mr Dave.

Below,  one of my doodling pictures drawn while day dreaming at school…

Just like Opie Taylor did, I walk the entire length of Mayberry, looking in every window and opening every door, while popping bubbles and going over today’s line-ups. I even stop by the courthouse to see if Andy and Barney are in.

First pitch is coming up, so I decide between either hanging out in the church or hanging out in the fort we built in Andy Griffith’s house. I choose the fort.

This iconic set is just half a house. The backside can be easily viewed from Higuera Street. A simple, two story home with a stairway built on the backside, going up to Opie’s room, which is now my fort. I’m Opie Taylor today…

I walk down the driveway, past the garage that is just an illusion wall, and straight up to my room. The porch roof  just outside the upstairs windows allows for a hasty exit, if necessary. That would mean jumping, of course, but it’s not bad at all; most my friends who have been here with me have already jumped off of it.

There are some explosive boxes from Stalag 13, which we brought up before, to use as seats. And a cot-bed made from rope has been brought up here by someone. I wonder… who!

Drapes cover the backside of this set. I put those up with Jimmy one day to block the view from the backside; We grabbed random fabrics from the neighbors’ houses and then we hooked them on various protruding nails.

There is only a simple, chain link fence just behind this house that others often stumble over to use my forts. It’s like an underground community. This house has a roof, of course, and the side walls, which extend farther along the side, than the roof does.

I light the joint that I’ve been carrying around all morning, as the first pitch is delivered. I gaze out the upstairs windows… the enormous church is in the foreground and beyond that, I see the Baldwin Hills, which frame my wonderful vision. I’m barely halfway through my doobie, and Pittsburgh has dropped three runs on L.A., and it’s still the first inning!

A car drives slowly in front of Andy’s house; it’s some fancy, purple, two seater sports car. It stops and the driver stares at this set, as I flatten myself against the wall. I see he has a pretty lady sitting beside him.

Probably some producer, I reckon!

Thought he’d never leave. The score is now 5-0. My day has been perfect, except for this score. I can see why the Pirates are known as “the lumber company,” as Willie Stargell goes deep on Doug Rau. An interesting fact pointed out by annoucer Ross Porter: only one player has ever hit a ball outside of Dodger Stadium. It is Willie Stargell, and amazingly, he has done it TWICE!

I was hoping for a World Series celebration today, but now it’ll come down to Game 5 to decide the NL Crown.

I have my sling shot and I shoot into the wind, from this upstairs vantage point, using random objects as projectiles. The tree in front of this house is famous for the episode where Opie shoots his sling shot at it, accidentally killing a mother bird. Opie must then raise Winkin, Blinkin and Nod on his own. I cried watching that episode; it’s actually the sadest episode, ever.

I fire away… Pow, Pow, Pow… figuring lighting can’t strike twice. It’s fun to daydream about all the stuff that has happened here, while being here. This is a museum; relics lay untouched behind old buidings, decades later. Signs are the most prevalent. A Mayberry Courthouse sign sits behind the courthouse, alongside a dilapidated miniature military boat.

Above: Behind the courthouse.

Both the sign and the boat have seen better days. I want this boat. If I can get it to the creek, I can float it half-way home. It will be a project for another day, when I have reinforcements. This ship is twice the size of the Hogan’s Heroes tree stump that Pat and I rolled out of here, a while back. But it sure would be fun to play with, in the creek!

It’s fun to go through buildings from top to bottom, to see what kind of views lie beyond  every window. Graffiti, done by various laborers, from shows long ago, is scribbled on the walls. Today is all about exploring… just being me.

Whether I’m shooting sling shots, chewing bubble gum, listening to baseball, or just being a Lone Ranger kid, an adventure awaits around every turn!

An anecdote…

As a side bar to this story, I was on the Grinch movie set, on Stage 27 at Universal, and was able to meet Ron Howard. We chatted briefly, since he was the director. He took a break, as we hung out at craft service, snacking. I asked him, “what was it like for you, growing up in Desilu?”

His response was delayed, “funny you should ask… I just was walking the the (Hayden Tract) with my daughters, showing them where the sets were located.”

I responded, “Did you ever go inside the Hogan’s Heroes tree stump?” He shook his head YES and smiled. My response was, “I ended up taking it when Stalag 13 was torn down…and I had a fort in the upstairs of your house!”

He smiled. “It was as much my home, as my Burbank home was. Very special place and time!”

No truer words were ever spoken, Mr Howard!

Many of my buddies on the Universal crew watched this brief exchange, from a short distance away, as they knew very well, my history on that lot. For weeks they wanted me to approach him and were thrilled about how he reacted… a super moment with a Hollywood icon, who I always felt a kinship with. People always told me I could “work as a double for Richie Cunningham.” And in a way, I literally walked his Opie footsteps…

At the wrap party, Ron shared a special moment, when he stood to toast Monty Menapiece, the Universal Best Boy, who was working on his last show and was retiring. He was the one who really wanted me to approach Ron about this stuff.

Monty was an electrician on the Andy Griffith show and Ron presented Monty will his moment in the sun. Monty cried in appreciation.

Class all the way… both men. Remembering fondly a different time in space…

Don’t change that channel… The Shelter, next, same time same place!

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…
Edited by DQ

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Something big is going on in front of Boystown…

After school, Jimmy and I head over for our daily fix of Lot 2. We perch ourselves amongst the owls in the church steeple, and watch as a portable trailer carefully backs its way through a narrow passageway, while a handful of workers guide him along.

Meanwhile, studio laborers, carpenters, and a various assortment of transportation vehicles actively go about their duties, as a structure is being framed alongside one of the dirt roads that intersects in front of my fort, at Boystown.

This backlot sure has been busy, yet rumours persist that it is “For Sale.” Whatever the price, it’s worth it, I think. This wonderful, magical place is perceived as hot property for developers. Apparently, studio big shots no longer think backlots are good for filming.

Magic sure does happen here. And I now know that to make that magic happen, you need the entire area. Like one huge, blank canvas… it can be converted into anything. One world can be transformed into another… a medieval hamlet can be revamped into a space age dreamscape with a few tricks and some fairy dust. If I owned this place, I would run a tour service with trams, just like Universal does… the way I already do, as a kid!

Like nowhere else…

It’s like I’m seeing into time… I know that right now, I’m sitting in an historic place that will one day, be looked back on as a legend, an iconic spot that defined an era. I feel proud to be able to call this place my stomping ground. But it’s even more than that for me. It’s like a retreat. It’s my special hideout, my place of adventures, all in one.

I feel like it’s a part of me and who I am yet to become. I couldn’t have known it yet, but it would sow the seeds of my future career as a tour guide. A bit of nostalgia wells up in me, as I see this film activity take place below me. I blow a kiss towards the MGM logo and water tower that stares back at me and the entire backlot, from the roof of Sound Stage 12, on Lot 1. There is nothing else I’d rather be doing and nowhere else I’d rather be!

Our Informant…

Jimmy and I wander over towards a table saw, as noise from the carpenters below disguises our movements. Elton John’s “Philadelphia Freedom” is blasting from the workers’ radio, as we attempt to fit in. With occasional interuptions by DJ J.J. Jackson, we quickly recognize the station as L.A.’s KLOS.

We discover that this is a movie starring Andy Griffith, Jeff Bridges and Blythe Danner. It will use German Village for the WWI scenes, as well as this new set, that they are framing, as we speak. “It’s a hotel we’re building,” I am told by one of the carpenters, who puffs on his cigarette as he speaks over the squealing saw blade. He points while exhaling, “the blueprint’s right over there.”

“The company is at Vasquez Rocks today” he quips, as a section of wood hits the ground. “Shoots next week—it’s a cowboy movie!” My informant friend nods as he leaves, with wood under his arm. “Cool, thanks!” we wave, in appreciation.

A week later…

We have watched this set grow in the usual way: building, painting, set decorations, and finally, electrical rigging. What I have learned to appreciate is the talent involved with each trade and department. For example, this hotel is brand new, yet the art department is aging it to look 100 years old. They are not just painters; they are artists.

Construction builds details only where the camera will see it, leaving vast sections blank and unfinished. Every step costs money, so departments pick and choose what is needed. These construction crews are well-oiled machines. It’s not their first rodeo, that’s for sure.

Someday, this is what I want to do… make that tomorrow, please!

The circus arrives…

After school, we arrive to machine-gun fire. An old bi-plane is being filmed, with guns a blazin’ against the backdrop of a sky. The plane sits on a gimbal, to create uneven movements and the appearance of flying.

We watch from the church first, while this village we’re in, sets up for future scenes. An Army truck is being positioned on the cobblestone street. This is an MGM show, so all the equipment has my iconic MGM symbols and logos painted somewhere on it. This increases the odds of MGM guards being present, but… that’s why we got legs! We are going on set!

We climb down from the church steeple, as set decorators put the finishing touches on my tiny village. We walk the cobblestone street, then under the arch, and position ourselves right behind camera, in the powerful director chair circle.

Director, make-up, camera, the stars Jeff and Bylthe, and… us!

We’re getting used to this and hiding in plain sight is becoming routine. Security doesn’t expect to find us this close. We have not seen any security yet, anyhow. Take advantage of the moment, or you may never get that chance again… that becomes my credo.

The loud rattle of the bi-planes’ machine guns is quite the distraction. Everyone has a hand on the side of their head, by the time this scene gets redone a few times.

When the smoke clears, there we are… next to Jeff Bridges in his WWI pilot garb.

This scene is finally captured on film and we all walk towards the next set, which is the French Combat Village… We feel like we own this place!

Jimmy and I sit inside the army truck, as Jeff Bridges and Blythe Danner rehearse the next scene. Mannequins of dead soldiers are laying around the street. They even put one on the running board of the truck. We exit the vehicle when we realize we’re in the shot that’s being set up…

All the buildings still have signs painted on them from Young Frankenstein…

The Rose Hotel

The show gets these much needed night shots at the Rose Hotel, right where this adventure started for us, just last week!

Written and lived by Donnie Norden
Edited by DQ

Don’t change the channel… A  hooky day from school—Mayberry style. Next up!

CLANK! is the deafening sound as my tiny crow bar collides with MGM’s wrought iron fence. It did not make a dent… CLANK! CLUNK! CLANK! CLUNK! again, like banging random car parts together… This time I got it! Third strike is a charm.

Punctured holes are a blessing and they exist all over this fence. I can tell some have been here for decades. These magical portals allow  us to see inside the backlot, it’s just like having our very own security cameras, or rather, spy viewers… for our reconnaissance and surveillance missions.

Jimmy and I are strategically placing these little slitted holes in very specific areas of this fenced lot, where it behooves us to see inside. This allows us to plan accordingly before entering. This compact 18″ tool is a perfect addition for any trespasser’s tool belt.

Pleased with our work, I hurry to take a peek inside the first set of holes. They are adjacent to the huge prop warehouse and the church, on Maple Street. We are currently standing on the side of the Southern Pacific train track line.

Unbeknownst to me, Red Ford Bronco is right there! As I peer inside, I see it right in front of me. Figures… this would be my first image, ever, through these new holes. The driver door is ajar, and I’m instantly baffled. Before I can think, a voice booms from atop the fence. Security guard Big Ron’s huge shadow covers me from above.

“So, you say you don’t vandalize this studio, don’t you John?” he says, in a deep voice that suits his Paul Bunyan size… I stand alone, embarrassed, realizing Jimmy is running away down these same train tracks. I stand my ground, with my crow bar in hand, speechless, staring upwards, trying to be innocent looking.

I silently realize… I know this looks bad, but I have nothing to say… so I also head west following the dust Jimmy just kicked up… I can’t talk my way out of this one, so it’s time for me to catch the next train to Santa Fe!

Above. train tracks and metal fence along Culver and Overland.

“John” is an alias I once gave to security, who now refer to me as “John Ordon.”

With tasks still at hand, and a crowbar latched to my belt, I make my way to the other side of the backlot, behind New York Street, on Montana Avenue. I have another set of holes to create; I target the metal fence behind New York Street, well aware that Big Ron is on the loose.

This time, I want to puncture this fence with one solid… BANG. 

The last set of holes almost got me in trouble because it took multiple wallops to create the punctures. Repetition attracts attention. The metal fence on this side of the studio is older and already littered with some marvelous holes in the fence! 

I psyche myself up while making myself gnarly looking with a tuff kid face. I envision my body’s movement before gaining momentum by taking two steps forward, towards the fence, then I unleash myself and all my fury, uncoiling my tool as if I were an Indian Chief with a tomahawk…

CRASH! I succeed in hitting the fence so hard this time, that one strike is all it takes. Presto! Two magic holes on one swing! Like christening an ocean liner. This time, no Bronco appears. My inaugural vision through these new spy holes is a magical sight. As I intrepidly look inside, I see filming taking place, off in the distant New York Street.

Arc lights triangulate around a shirtless, tanned, bald-headed, male actor. He is too far away to decipher, and he seems to be standing on a tipped-over car. My first ever vision through this kaleidoscope of holes is an actor filming a cool scene… nice!

These tiny holes in the fence open up to a gigantic entryway, transporting me to another dimension.

This compact little crow bar device is already paying off, like a back stage pass.

Whatever this show is… we will soon find out.

Planet of the Apes was cancelled and all the crumbled cement has been removed. This is a Warner Brothers film. All the trucks have the W.B. logo. I quickly go home, skipping right past Jimmy—who somehow managed NOT to tell me Big Ron was RIGHT above me—stopping instead, at Danny’s house.

My simple “they’re filming at MGM” is all that’s needed. It pulls him away from after-school TV, shows like Match Game with Gene Rayburn, and Tattletales, with Bert Convy. Danny veg’s out on these shows after school and has the hots for Elaine Joyce!

But anyways…

I quickly exchange my crowbar for a pot pipe as we head back over to MGM, by the same tracks I left on.

We climb up to a rooftop, above the lights and cameras. Quickly, we take it all in. Cars are flipped or vandalized and some are missing tires and parts. One vehicle sits on its side, as that man that was wearing only pants, stands on top of it.

A group of transients shout at him, but he does not respond to the mob’s hollering, at all. This set is exactly where the ground opened up for Planet of the Apes, capturing a human and an ape. But now… a robotic-looking guy stands above, looking down on his followers, much like Big Ron was looking down on me, just a short while ago.

Who is that guy?… we think, outloud. Danny nails it, it’s Yul Brynner.

I love this dude. Westworld is one of my favorite movies ever, it reminds me of how we play in MGM.

We see that catering has left. And with the sun about to set, this is probably the last scene of the day. Rule of thumb: when the food goes away, or shortly thereafter, the company goes away.

We need to get up as close as we can. And we do; MGM has security on the backlot, but not on this set.

I need to see this robot-looking, warrior guy… up close. We walk directly to the set, like we belong there, and as we correctly presumed, the martini shot is taking place. We stand right at camera, as crew starts rolling away anything with wheels on it.

Here comes a band on the run is this afternoon sci fi real life moment…

We watch from up close, just out of frame, as this scene gets filmed several times. Yul listens almost comatosely while the survivors of a mysterious, mass human annihilation, offer incentives to join their club.

Yul comes to life only to talk to the director in between takes, then as the camera begins to roll again, he turns back into a statue.

Each time, each scene, Yul interacts with the director, who is right in front of us. We are right in Yul’s line of vision, and it’s as if we’re part of a directing team. He even looks at us, when interacting with the director. Finally, I become mesmerized in his robotic eyes. He is the most robotic person I ever laid eyes on. Like he just stepped out of Westworld.

One more take, then the director yells, “Check the Gates!”

That is movie terminology for… Checking for dust or debris that may be on the camera lens before saying “Cut or Wrap!”

Many scenes will be cut and edited to appear as a bigger New York Street, since this show has many exterior locations on Warner Brothers’ backlot, also.

You can probably tell how these are exactly the same sets, weeks later, from Planet of the Apes.

Not knowing this was scheduled today made this day a wonderful surprise. Being up close to this legendary movie star and watching him practice his craft will create memories for Danny and I to cherish forever.

All this, thanks to an 18″ crowbar and two-holes in the fence!

Below, other scenes filmed on MGM’s Lot 2:

The Looks of War...Donnie Norden, Yul Brynner  showdown face to face in middle of 5th Avenue, MGM Lot 2.

Written and lived by Donnie Norden
Edited by DQ

This is the night I’ve been waiting for! I have been a Los Angeles Kings fan since their inception into the league in 1967. They are going against the red hot Philadelphia Flyers, who will make their one and only appearance at LA’s Fabulous Forum tonight.

With names like Dave “The Hammer” Schultz, Bob “The Hound” Kelly, André “Moose” Dupont and Don “Big Bird” Saleski, you’d think we’re talking about a Disney on Ice show, but these are the most fierce competitors on ice, playing in an arena near you.

This group has a penchant for beating up players on the opposing team; this may include the fans, who often try to accost them from the stands in protest of their dirty tactics. It’s must see NHL. My pal, Gerald, drives the Zamboni that cleans the Forum’s ice and even better… he sneaks me inside The Forum, through a backstage door.

The game goes as expected… the Flyers dominate and intimidate Los Angeles. Early in the 3rd period, after a goal by Bobby Clarke, the fans exit in droves, as the score spirals to an insurmountable lead of 6-2. Me and Jimmy cash in on all the chaos. While the stampede floods the isles, we slide into a couple seats right behind the Flyers’ bench.

My eyes must have doubled in size… I can’t believe what I’m looking at. They’re right there! We can literally touch their red jerseys. We can smell their sweat. I catch myself with my mouth hanging open, but I have to look nonchalant.

Jimmy and I begin to wonder what we sat down to. It quickly becomes a moment of be careful what you wish for. Or, like the moment in the Wizard of Oz, when she pulls back the curtain only to find that the marvels of the mind don’t quite measure up, in reality.

The L.A. fans are like drunken sailors. They’re loud and crude and foul mouthed and they toss around insults faster than they throw down bottles of beer and anything else they can get their hands on. And they spit.

Suddenly, a chocolate malt flies over us, hitting Mr. Schultz “The Hammer,” and the players along side him. They turn backwards and stand with their sticks raised… making eye contact with me and Jimmy, as if we’re the culprits.

Heck, we just sat down… we were hoping for memories, sitting this close, but this moment has become… SCARY! 

We sink deeply into our seats as the players revolt feverishly… fortunately, the fan that tossed the melted mess stands up and begins cursing! The players focus their attention on him as Inglewood police step in between all of us.

This video below is typical of the NHL in 1974/75…

After we get home, me and Jimmy and Gerald all go relive this experience at MGM. It’s just after 11pm when we jump over the fence. We head from the train station entrance to Maple Street, where we climb up to the roof top of a house we call the “Two-chimneys.”

We pop our heads out of each chimney, taking turns peering over the town square, in the dark. The Bronco slowly drives by below us, with his lights off, unaware of our presence. New York street glows, off in the distance… work lights illuminate the piles of concrete still present from Planet of the Apes. That show is on a hold as producers wait on the ratings of the six episodes to compute.

New York Street remains dressed and ready to film. That show, as does my gang, will depend on these ratings for future episodes… Please Watch!

We are still wound up from the Broad Street Bullies experience. I trip over an electrical spider box and fall down a flight of steep, narrow and very dark and dirty old stairs.

As I examine myself for damages in the dark, I realize that I split my noggin. Blood flows freely down my face. I look like I just scrimmaged the Flyers. I continue to play, albeit injured!

We rehash each and every highlight of tonight’s game, catching ourselves as we talk much too loudly, in all our excitement from the day’s adventures. As my left eye begins to swell shut, I think to myself, it adds a nice touch. It’ll make a nice story tomorrow, when kids at school ask me what happened.

The only light anywhere in this town square is the cherry at the end of the doobie we are toking on now…

We head home about mid-night. Jimmy is his usual clean self, Gerald can proudly saddle his Zamboni, but I look like an opponent who was beaten up and doing a lot time in a penalty box…

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…
Edited by Donna Quesada

The free pass that was supposed to last all week barely got us to lunch on day one.  The rest of this day we will be climbing New York street roof tops and peering out open windows. We make auxiliary plans as we finish our catered meal.

Prime rib, chocolate cake, apple pie a la mode are chased down by several containers of milk. This concludes the fanciest meal this fort has ever seen. This spread is like my lovely mother’s meals at Thanksgiving. But today is just Tuesday in the middle of the summer.

We tell ourselves we should not feel disappointed. We’ll just go back to what we do best, which is sneaking around… like we own the place.

We have a meeting to discuss what’s next for us here, and as we lick our fingers, we both agree that catering will still be a part of our day.

We develop our plans as we linger over the last bites of this meal that is fit for a king. We already know that breakfast is prefabbed and wrapped in foil, so even though it doesn’t measure up to the layout we just enjoyed, it’s perfect for kids on the go. Mini Fruit Loops boxes, little milk containers and breakfast burritos… all for the taking. So, we will just pop in and out through the doorways that are perfectly positioned next to the food tables. Just like some sort of phantoms…

It’s usually easy to grab lunches after the crew gets theirs. In fact, we quickly discover that being last to eat gets you the most food, since studio caterers don’t keep leftovers. “Take whatever you guys need” is the only encouragement we need, as Michelson catering hands us more clean plates. I feed fellow trespassers with the abundance of gourmet delights, like I’m the host of this joint.

I take enough to feed friends waiting inside New York Street buidings. Call me the “caterer for trespassers.” I barter my food services for good dope.

Being resiliant allows us to not skip a beat.

Back on set…

The Public Library…that sign was put above this entrance for Soylent Green.

The Apes caught a couple trespassers…

Above: Matte Painting… before and after of New York Street.

Apes and humans unite to save the combatants. The Apes above ground need to rely on human ingenuity to engineer an escape from the collapsed subway. The remainder of this afternoon focuses on this series of events. Trust is needed… Apes must trust the humans.

And the following filmed interactions evolve from suspicion and even gunfire towards the human rescuers to a bond of empathy and compassion as they begin work in unison towards a single cause. That is, to save one human, James Naughton, and one ape… Urko.

For Jimmy and I, it’s business as usual. Sneaking precariously close to every scene that is shot, just out of frame. The production manager is wearing a T-shirt that says Project Questor. We try to stay out of the sight lines of the director and this individual, since these are the same two that crumbled up our free pass.

We are amazed by all the trespassers. They have made their way to every building, every window and every doorway. Word spread like wildfire. Venice High kids, Culver kids, Catholic kids, and some that are simply bad kids!

I see a Sullivan kid with a rifle that an ape set down on the edge of a building. We make eye contact as he stands inside a building looking it over, I point authoritatively while gesturing. The message was received loud and clear, although no words were spoken. He swiftly put it back!

There is a lot of filming ahead and taking weapons will not be tolerated by me or this production company. Plus, I may get blamed since I am now under the microscope. I can’t have these dumb kids ruining my operation here. Ironically, while the guards keep my name at the top of their list, I become the real guardian of these treasures.

As camera angles change on this Ape/Human rescue, commotion between the camera man and the director catches our attention. As we sit, perched above the cave-in, another small group of out of control kids splinters off towards the end of New York Street.

And now, unsurprisingly, the camera picks up trespassers crossing the street during a shoot. These kids are out of control. They have to go!

There are so many groups of kids here that I am not sure who the culprits really are, but soon enough, they disappeared.

Next, in another scene, Roddy McDowall runs into some kids in a doorway, and to our astonishment, he goes inside and walks out with my pal, Gerald, and a couple of other nieghborhood kids.

He has his hand on Gerald’s shoulder. Jimmy and I are blown away… Roddy is giving all the kids clearance and is letting them all stay in the buildings as guests on the set. What a cool guy!

OK… So, only Jimmy and I are not allowed on this set anymore but every other rotten kid is cleared, compliments of Roddy McDowall?

Roddy would’ve saved us if he had gotten to us first.

Dusk ends, day one. What a day.

The Grand Central Train Station is on the docket for many scenes. So, since Jimmy and I are banned, we set up ladders on the train tracks just outside the studio fence and just adjacent to today’s filming.

This set was used two weeks ago by the Fortune company, with Warren Beatty. Extra security has been in place, since all the mayhem, in an attempt stop juvenile interruptions. That means a full dose of Big George and Bronco Bob.

We are not trespassing. Just loitering is all. Being in a high profile area, in public view from Culver Blvd and Elenda Street, we quickly attract attention from all directions; the set, all the actors, and the Culver City public. We have become a spectacle. Our hodge podge ladders of every shape and size are all leaning and positioned for fun and easy viewing.

A blur of heads and shoulders bobbing up and down is what the cast sees as they film scenes. They smile and wave at us in between takes. As the day gets longer, more ladders and kids arrive. A mob of sight seeers is on one side of the fence while actors and apes do their thing on the other side.

Maureen’s apartment is a sling shot away and she finally wanders over to join the mob. I save her a special rung on my ladder. Well, perfectly timed… here comes Roddy McDowall. In between scenes, he monkees around with us. First he acts completely like an ape, but then he reaches up with his ape hands to touch all the kids’ hands.

The director waits for his return. Everyone is watching this moment… all the actors, stunt folk and crew, as Roddy wishes each and every kid a wonderful day!

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…
Edited by DQ

Due to the large amount of interest in this recently published list, I am resubmitting it for your approval… the document in it’s entirety.

Addresses, phone numbers, and of course… who nailed ya!

 We all should’ve run faster…

Below: 1931 MGM logo

Notice Jerry Sullivan on the bottom section. He was a regular trespasser, going all the way back to our St. Augustine school years.

The footnote states: four people caught – all gave his name. (Pardon me while I laugh! As if anyone would give their real name!)

The footnote continues: All have been on the lot several times. I would turn them over to CCPD (…is how B.C. delt with this capture.)

B.C. is Bob Coleman, alias Bronco Bob… the same guard who shot at another Catholic school boy friend named Pat Rich. He is the same guard who had me kicked off the Planet of the Apes set in previous blog… when I dressed up in Ape gear!

Written and lived and taken by…Donnie Norden

New York street at MGM has a new look. It’s apocalyptic!

“Planet of the Apes” is going to be a high budget show, and lots of money being spent means lots of potential fun for me! What kid doesn’t like this stuff? Once again, a story I enjoyed on the big-screen has now become something very real that I can be part of.

These type of sets are massive, with tons of people involved–it takes an army of technicians to film an army of apes!

My dad successfully secured passes for me and a guest to watch filming, so there’s no need for me to hide on this shoot! It will take two weeks to film the pilot episode, then a “hold” will be placed on the set until the ratings come in, so please watch!

Jimmy is the lucky friend I choose to be my guest, and our host is stand-by set painter named Glen. On our first morning he’s very busy, clearly being pulled in several different directions at once. Fortunately, we know the place better than he does and can entertain ourselves.

Our invitation to the set includes two meals and unlimited craft service, and we sample everything–fruit loops, bagels, and breakfast burritos. I especially enjoy the perk of having endless chocolate milk.

It’s not long before Roddy McDowall walks by us in a bath robe, already in ape make-up and on his way to wardrobe.

Roddy’s daily transformation. He always made an effort to greet young fans.

As Jimmy and I take it all in, we can’t help but notice the MGM security guards who know us well. It’s only a matter of time before we run afoul of Bronco Bob or Big George, and I expect some explaining will be in order. “Sorry fellas! We walked in the front gate, here’s our pass!”

From what I can glean about the story-line, apes are currently on the warpath against humans. They’re led by “Urko,” the top ape sporting a tall leather helmet that makes him especially intimidating.

He and many other apes will be on horseback, so horses tied up everywhere on New York street, each with a gun harnessed to their saddle. Of course, these equestrian thespians need to rehearse too, so trainers and stuntmen have commandeered an alley where they can put the animals through the motions.

Unlike Roddy MacDowall, who arrives before sunup owing to the long hours he has to spend in the makeup chair, most of the actors wear ape masks that can be slipped on and off. It’s amazing just to hang out among all these Hollywood gorillas casually eating, smoking, and talking SAG. Who knew that apes were union!

Well, this Rolling Stones song sums up this set…

Elsewhere on the set, the stunts and effects departments are working hand-in-hand on a gag where an earthquake causes a sidewalk to collapse into a subway tunnel. In the aftermath, a human and an ape find themselves trapped underground and in desperate need of rescue. This, it appears, will be the complex scene of the day.

Finally, the first scene is up! Mounted apes race through various New York street intersections. We’ve been given strict orders that there are to be no pictures on this set, but I brought a little Kodak “Instamatic” just in case…

I watch intently as the special effects department sets up a rifle that fires “squibs.” These are capsules of blasting putty that create the appearance of a bullet strike on impact. Using these can be dangerous, so the close supervision of effects and stunt departments is obligatory, and stars are replaced by stunt doubles where possible.

Concerned that we get the best view of the action scenes, Jimmy and I decide to watch from the rooftop directly above the soon-to-collapse sidewalk. This effect is ready to rumble.

Directly below us we can see Roddy McDowall (pictured) smoking a cigarette in his blue robe. We’re close enough that the smoke blows into our building, and I snap a couple pictures, keeping in mind that I’ve only got twelve on the roll.

Above photo: My pals, The Sullivans are here, in this building looking out windows. All told, there are about 10 trespassers inside here.

Jimmy spots Gerald across the street on another rooftop. Soon we realize, every kid on our street seems to be either in a window or on a rooftop. We wave and signal like a network. They’re all trespassing except us. Not today. I’ve got a backstage pass suckers!

A countdown begins as the director anxiously speaks into his megaphone “Three, two, one…ACTION!”

Dust flies, fake stones crumble and fall, taking with them an ape and a human destined to wind up in the bowels of the subway. This scene was perfectly executed and, after some quick “pick up” shots, crew lunch is called.

Now back at street level, Jimmy and I linger around camera and the directors chair area while the rest of the crew moves toward catering. Urko slips off his massive leather helmet and ape hand gloves and leaves them sitting in his chair as he joins the others.

There’s no one else around, so. . . I decide to try on Urko’s helmet. Followed by his hands and gloves. And to complete the ensemble, I grab one of the single-bolt rifles that are laying around. All decked out in Urko’s outfit (pictured below), I think I look pretty sharp!

All I need now is a horse!

Before I can requisition one, however, we’re interrupted. Coming around the corner and staring directly at us is none other than Bronco Bob! He’s on foot, and very probably wondering why we are not taking off.

He heads straight for us, but I speak first. “Hold on Bob! we are guests on this set today.”

Here I am, MGM’s “most wanted,” sitting in a director’s chair, dressed in full ape regalia, telling Bob in his flimsy little security outfit to back off. You could almost see the steam coming off Bob’s bald head!

(Urko’s helmet and gloves pictured here are the same I was wearing when I encountered Bronco Bob Coleman of MGM security.)

I can tell Bob wants to rip up my pass. He makes a face like the one Sergeant Carter gives Gomer Pyle when he’s angry!

The spitting image of Security Guard Bronco Bob!

And with that, lunch is served!

Ok Bob, we get it!…could that be me inside this mask?

It’s why Bob came over here in the first place: to eat! As we relax and chow down, we observe Bob going to many different tables and talking to many different people. At one of those tables is the director, Arnold Laven. Bob gets his attention, then starts angrily pointing at us.

We can’t hear what Bob’s saying exactly, but the intention is clear. He wants us out of here! Not two seconds later he bee-lines to our table with a satisfied grin on his face.

“You two are outta here!”

“Can we finish eating please?” I protest.

“No! You’re coming with me. The director has revoked your pass.”

Ain’t that some shit? I’d say we’ve been good as gold. There are a dozen legitimate trespassers on the property right now and Bob busts the only ones who have a pass! As we reach the main gate on Overland, Bob cracks it open and says “Get outta here!”

“Good luck jerk” I reply. “And you better get a paddy wagon for all the trespassers in there right now. You don’t have time to waste eating fatso!”

Jimmy and I walk away, but not any farther than our own gate around the corner. Ten seconds later we’re right back inside the lot.

We cautiously approach catering, knowing Bob may be headed here also. We grab trays and load up with gourmet food, indulging in the seemingly endless offerings. With plastic trays and pockets overflowing, we head to our Boystown fort.

For now we’ll go back to how we normally operate at the backlot: secretly and stealthily. After all, there is still tons of filming ahead!

“Emergency” entrance.

More pix snapped on the sly.

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…

In 1938, an unusually large production on the Desilu backlot needed to build a train station for a few key scenes. The show was, of course, “Gone With the Wind,” and the depot scenes (seen below) are some of the most stirring and memorable in the film.

Unfortunately, most of it burned down a long time ago, and what little survived has since been torn down.

Desilu again laid down rail tracks in 1959 for the “The Untouchables” series. In a spectacular two-parter (episodes 40 and 41), Eliot Ness foils an attempt to hijack the “Alcatraz Express” by criminals intent on freeing Al Capone.

But by 1974, Desilu no longer had this or any other train station. In fact, there were only three depots left in Tinseltown, two of  them are on the MGM backlot and one at Twentieth Century Fox at their main entrance. That one is an L-train. Trains are the thing as both these sets will have train scenes. L-train tracks are now being installed on sections of New York street. After the Fortune gets it’s nicely decorated shots, this rail depot will go haunted looking again like it did in the Phantom of the Backlot. What kid doesn’t like a haunted railroad?

Vincente Minnelli’s “The Band Wagon” (1953) immortalized one of these iconic MGM stations.

And here’s the same gang plank in 1974! This was effectively the last time the station would look so polished, as a little movie called “Planet of the Apes” would soon transform it.

 Which brings us to “The Fortune” (1975),  a Mike Nichols’ film starring Jack Nicholson and Warren Beatty.  This show needed a train station, but since Desilu no longer had one, they were obliged to bring the whole production circus over to MGM, a “company move” of less than two miles. It was a pretty easy job for a driver if you could get it.

Maureen gets the ball rolling by calling me about a tremendous amount of activity and lighting she can see from her bedroom window. Jimmy is with me, and we’re already preparing to visit the set when she calls. “We’re on our way! Bye!”

Jimmy and I check in with her, chatting through the bedroom window. She turns down our invite to sneak in, then brags about having a relative who’s a gaffer on this set. Apparently, she has her own “in!”

Maureen looks awfully pretty through the window screen. She’s wearing a white top, and Jimmy and I both smell her perfume. We’re wearing black, since it works well with trespassing at night. We look like criminals and Maureen looks like she stepped off a beach calendar.

Tonight she can wear a dress and get all dolled up since she has a free ticket to ride.  “We’ll be up in the church steeple,” I tell her. “Say a prayer for us trespassers”! Signal us a ‘hello’ from the set tonight.”

“If you see Big George, he’s gonna wanna see proof you’re legal. Tell him I’m there too. With ten other guys!  That should distract him!”

We all giggle, laugh, and split.

Jimmy and I easily make it up to the church belfry. We stare down like we’re in some kind of space capsule observing a very lit-up Earth from above. The shape is actually similar to a space craft: a cone shape at the top that tightly squeezes in two guests side by side.

Trust me, I’m a kid who has been in a space capsule. This is very similar. It allows us a view of the set as if from a lunar orbiter.

The views from this steeple.

Jimmy and I watch as vans shuttle the crew back and forth. Diesel exhaust from generators conveniently disguises the pot odor we’re generating up here.

Jimmy seems less about this moment tonight and more about Maureen. If I had an “eject button” up here, I’d use it. He’s too interested in my girlfriend. . . who we suddenly see, dressed in white, frolicking on the set! She’s been escorted there by her gaffer friend, and I know she knows we’re up here . . .

We watch as she walks around next to Warren Beatty. He and Jack Nicholson are having an intense conversation as they push a cart holding Stockard Channing. (See above.)

We watch Maureen as she slithers around the set, eventually moseying over to the fence by the train depot where we all climb in. No one but us and the two owls next to us can see this next move. . .

Maureen signals for our attention as if she’s landing a jet on an aircraft carrier. Broad hand gestures are directed up at us, and we respond, popping our heads out and waving quickly so as not to be seen by the entire set.

Below, Maureen’s view as she signals the church tower… 

Contact has been made, but the symbols have changed. Maureen extends her middle finger and proudly flicks us the bird.

Just as quickly, we respond. Four arms and four pointing birds protrude outwards from the steeple towards that hot little blonde in the nice, white beach outfit. That’s what’s called “doubled-barrel flicking” the bird.

We stay until midnight, Beatty and Jack filming inside the old Pullman. As we leave, we take a final glimpse before jumping back over the fence and heading home.

We stop briefly to tap on Maureen’s window. Some messed up hair and then a hand peer back at us. Her hand quickly changes from a polite and friendly five finger wave to a one finger stationary Universal salute. She got us again!

We laugh all the way home, one block away.

Planet of the Apes set dressing. New York street get’s prepared, while “The Fortune” shoots at the depot. Stay tuned!

Written and lived by Donnie Norden

MGM’s New York street is seeing massive preparation for a new TV series based off the popular “Planet of the Apes” movies.

When a group of studio laborers tell me this, I can’t believe it! These are my favorite movies in the theaters, and now they’ll be both on TV and filming in my backyard!

Set decoration is already underway. Truckload after truckload of concrete and broken cement is being dumped along the length of New York Street and Brownstone Street. It’s a massive undertaking.

It’s all there to make things look post-apocalyptic. The phony high-rises on the backlot have theoretically been damaged or destroyed by earthquakes. Humans exist, but live like rats in the decay, and apes are now in charge of this area code.

It will take a few weeks to get this set up to snuff, with the labor and art crews working side by side. Special effects is also busy on some gags, including “earthquakes” that will cause a subway to collapse. An endless line of dump trucks line New York street, dumping load after load of broken concrete on all the streets that intersect in this metropolis. Bobcats, or tiny tractors, then skillfully reposition this cement along sidewalks and doorways. Cement destruction due to Earthquakes are what the Art Department is selling here.

Everyone on the set is friendly, which makes it easy for me and my pals to intermingle with the Fox crew. Work lights illuminate the set at night for security, hazards exist everywhere, and MGM guards patrol the area after closing. Seeing this set under the glow of 1000 watt light bulbs screwed into worklight stands that stretch the length of the street called 5th avenue is extremely impressive. The light stands are so old they look like they were in some old monster movies, they appear haunted themselves. Rigid steel uprights with a 90 degree bend on the top hold a large caged light bulb that is almost the size of a human head. These lights get daisy chained together and appear to go on forever. When we see security do foot patrol, the lights cast huge human form shadows on the fronts of all the buildings. These shadows are spooky, yet fascinating. Security appears as giant monsters at night. But from 6am to 6pm, it’s just 20th Century Fox and a studio work force preparing the streets.

As preparation takes place on this end of the backlot, the opposite end is busy with painters painting the old trains. Most importantly, the whole set can be seen from my girlfriend Maureen’s bedroom window.

This art department at the train station has inherited a decent looking set, Young Frankenstein had this depot looking good. The Fortune, which is currently shooting on the Desilu lot, is just hanging a few light fixtures and splashing on some fresh green paint over signage that says Pennsylvania Station. While the west end of Lot 2 starts to sparkle, the east end is spending a lot of money to fabricate a decayed environment policed by apes. 

I’m told that as soon as the train scenes are wrapped with Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson, the set will immediately flip over to “Planet of the Apes.”

The Fortune needs the station to look fancy and modern–plush looking trains, folks in suits and ties, etc. The “Apes” want the exact opposite. They want a hunting ground where they can eliminate rag-clad humans!

Apes on horseback with rifles are going to swarm this old train depot, but not until after The Fortune shoots its intricate, interactive dialogue scenes here. As complete opposite ends of the spectrum as you could want to see.

Little do I know at this time that my dad is working behind the scenes, trying to get me access to the “Planet of the Apes” set. It’s an opportunity that rarely presents itself, and I may have a big surprise waiting a few weeks down the line, but for now it’s still a dad’s secret from his son.

What’s fun is seeing the daily progression of the sets and how cool everything looks all lit up in the night-time! This place is normally very dark at night, I mean, very scary dark!

Word rapidly spreads through the school-kids network about what’s in store on the backlot. Even people I don’t normally care much for are suddenly showing an interest, asking for info, schedules, or even just to show them around. I’m popular, like some producer’s kid!…

I should charge admission. This event most certainly will sell out!

I expect there to be a large neighborhood turn out when the film trucks and equipment finally start rolling in. MGM security will have its hands full … as we look forward to a little Hot Fun in the Summertime.

Written and lived by Donnie Norden…